Sex and death. Sex and death. Death is coming, so quick, have sex!
These seem to be the two great motivators in life. One of them I am certainly motivated by... Death being my motivation to survive. Sex, however, as a motivational force is something I've largely avoided. Mostly because there are more important things than the seeking of a temporary base pleasure as a method of wasting time before our inevitable deaths. ("Well, when you put it like that...") Better to have greater motivations... right?
Well, maybe my line on this is a blunt one. It's just that, sexual motivation in the wrong mindset leads to things like rape, which is basically one of the most abhorrent things someone can do. Someone can be so motivated by sexual desire that it ceases to matter whether the other person also wants it. It's a fucked up mentality focused on something so unimportant. Sex is nice, but that's all it is - you should simply never act with such a selfish intention that sex may be the consequence. Sex happens anyway, without you specifically pushing towards it, and you don't have to lie or mentally scar people over it.
Then, of course, there's the people who do think having constant strings of sex is what they want, and well, that's fine, too. Don't let me to be the one to tell you otherwise... just, be responsible and do it genuinely, without deceit... So long as it actually makes you happy.
In the same way that I see through sex as a base process and not the be-all and end-all of living, there, then, is the other desire - that of love. Love... also isn't ideal, to be honest. It does get in the way, it can very much hinder who you are or what you want to do if you go about it wrong. Yet, it is a much desired thing, an overwhelming idea that love is the goal of life: you work, you live, you survive and if you want to be happy you drop everything and fall in love. That's the belief isn't it? Well it is wrong; it is entirely possible to live a happy life without seeking love, or being in it. If you don't want a relationship - that is fine, don't let the constant drones of 'why are you still single?' fool you otherwise.
Yet, while I do not seek love as a motivation - if it was presented in front of me, would I make the choice to embrace it, even if it were to hinder what I want out of life and the goals I want to achieve? I honestly don't know. It feels more like a 'back-up' happiness, but a warm and fuzzy one. It simply annoys me that even though I see through it for what it is worth and have much higher goals, I am not exempt from the desire of love.
...It is not only worthy of note, but rather a necessity in understanding human actions, that our motivations are at the core of everything we do. So, suffice to say, happiness is the biggest motivator of all, as a thing we all desire. Sometimes, though, it is fatally difficult to distinguish between what you think will make you happy, and what will actually make you happy. What are simple pleasures, and what are more complex notions of 'the good'.
I've said no to friends because I didn't think their suggestion was wise. I've said no to sex because I believed it was not in our best interests; friends and mutual respect being more important. I've said no to drugs, because it's no better than pretend pleasure to mask the fear of death; inhibiting my life's goals. I've said no to good opportunities that I think will lead to fewer consequential opportunities. Am I happier for it? Not a clue, but I'm hopefully a good person, still.
So, I'm still trying to figure all of my motivations out, but I've got a good basis. Death motivates me to live long, happiness motivates me to act against expectations and introspection motivates me to be a good person.
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